Tuesday, September 15, 2009
Benson is now ten weeks and can hold his head up more and more. He also smiles a lot more and loves to coo at one of the walls in our bedroom. All the hard work of caring for him definitely pays off when he smiles at me.
While I was pregnant with Benson, I had several friends and relatives tell me that when they had their babies, they just felt so much love and never realized how much you could love one person until they had their children. They retold their stories of the first time they held their newborn baby and how emotionally it was because their hearts were full for this child and just love them so much.
I was excited to have this feeling and when Scott put Benson in my arms for the first time, it was not the thought that I had and the only feeling I felt was nervessness. Secretly I felt like a bad mother but never told anyone of this disappointment.
I've been trying to get a night schedule down for Benson and part of the routine I'd like for him to have is reading stories to him before bed. Last week I read to him "Love you forever" and after the second page of the story, my heart started to fill and i began to cry when it read
"I'll love you forever,
I'll like you for always,
as long as I'm living
my baby you'll be"
I finally know what so many of these women were telling me. I'm so glad that we have Benson and he has brought so much happiness in our lives